?

Log in

it's boneless [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]
richard

[ website | it's my birthday ]
[ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ]
[ archive | journal archive ]

it's all downhill [May. 31st, 2004|04:26 pm]
richard
i'm losing fans at a rate of 1,400 a day
the last polls showed me at a 17% approval rating

but for the remaining 3.4 million loyal viewers i bring you:

[MY WEEKEND]
starring me (costaring disguiso)

so eliseo had this party and it was real fun
but everyone is used to seeing richard (ME) at parties
alot so i thought i'd change it up
so i stayed home and sent disguiso out instead

who's disguiso you ask
well disguiso looks alot like me but wears dark clothing, a hat, dark sunglasses, and a drawn on moustache
and he walks around introducing himself to people i already know and saying "i'm new in town"
but saying it alot so that it becomes a catchphrase

so after a long while disguiso goes into the bathroom and then i emerge with no glasses, no hat, no dark clothes and definatley no fake moustache

so i walk around and people say "hey disguiso!"
and i go "who?" and keep saying "i just got here"
because that's my catchphrase

[also]

for those in my area
i'm debating weather (YES WEATHER) or not to bring back disguiso or possibly try out "bluelooga" or "the elephant"

i like "bluelooga" alot not just because i like saying it lots of times over and over but because who wouldn't want a big blue padded beluga, i mean "bluelooga" at their party.

call me for more info
and for advance tickets
Link3 comments|Leave a comment

it's that time [May. 27th, 2004|01:30 pm]
richard
[Current Mood |amusedamused]
[Current Music |FANTASIA BARRINO IS RAD]

what people say about richard

Flea, 05/23/2004:
i love ritchie.........he is a happy person who loves everything.....especially to win!!! so if you wanna stay friends with ritchie don't ever beat him, cause he will hunt you down and get you back when you are least expecting it. But ritchie is still a sweetie.........xoxoxo-flea

Jennifer, 12/27/2003:
Richard is the biggest liar & piece of shit asshole that I have ever known.

Geneva, 11/10/2003:
Richard makes wierd girgling noises when he sleeps..

Bianca, 10/26/2003:
Richard is Fabulous with his doodoo brown coorduroy jaket. His Sweeping hair and delicate skin are a distant memoir of our past. His creativity SHOCKS me.......ShOckS me.

Arthur J., 10/14/2003:
richie turns bright red when he drinks. his laughter becomes contagious. then you want to slap him.

Chance, 10/14/2003:
richard steals from children, lies to his mother, is always late, forgets my name, forgets his name, hangs up without saying "bye", doesn't floss, never picks up the check, winks at strangers, laughs at old people, uses super premium gasoline, and i still thinks he the coolest cat around. i have enough embarrassing stories and photo's of richard to blackmail him when he becomes a household name.

Jen May 24, 2004 12:37 AM
Richard tried to "sexily" pet my puppy. Prolly the only girl he'll ever try to molest. haha.

Paul May 16, 2004 11:00 AM
Richard is cool I guess. He's not Fonzy or anythhing. But he's cool.

leave yer own thought on richard
Link1 comment|Leave a comment

all the news that can fit [May. 25th, 2004|01:48 am]
richard
you better read this, twice even
cause i don't update much lately and ya gotta catch up

let me explain
you know how when you talk all day and stuff
and you go home you have nothing to talk about
(well not everyone i can hang out with someone for a weekend and they'll still call when i get home and talk more)

well that's how it's been
i have nothing to write because i'm talking too much.

my aim name STARTEXPLODING has been banned
so i'm using ITSBONELESS for right now

[HEAR IT HERE FIRST]
ok so me and paul and maybe david are starting a social group
drama troupe, and the only ones who will know are the people reading this because it will be better that way

how it works:
so you go to a party or large social gathering with strangers
and act out a dramatic scene leading to the other troupe member storming out

so then the strangers start to try to help you or talk or something as yer pretend crying or angry or something

and you go outside to go talk to the other troupe member while the people stay inside and talk amongst themselves about the situation...wait ten to 15 minutes then you both come back into the room all made up or something along those lines

i encourage all my friends to start their own social group drama troupes or SGDT's in their area so that we can share the magic. seriously! it's a good time.

to all my friends: yer all cool, i guess
to all my enemies: fuck y'all

yers truly(with all the sincerity in a IM conversation),
-richard
Link1 comment|Leave a comment

party time [May. 11th, 2004|03:21 pm]
richard
yesterday was so fun
really really fun

well it was arthur's birthday and we celebrated in the park until the sun went down with croquette and jello shots and gifts and ducks and stuff
the ducks were cool though some of the people there were snobs and so me and paul and david left to go to bev's house.

at bev's house
ok this is the funner part
first we bought some robots and put them together
and david was happy because he put his together really fast
but his was so lame it was just a box with arms and legs
mine took a long time but mine was rad
it was this submarine that turned into a robot and of colorful plastic variety

double d is really a neat guy
he's fun but he thought it would pass time by making light of my tallness
(only because he's short and possibly jealous)
i'm only 6'4" i'm not 10ft or 100ft
he also said my hands weigh 50 pounds a piece and that if i wanted to that i could
grab bev or janna in my fist and climb onto the top of the empire state building

you know what i hate, people who talk about music and then say

"yeah after the show we went out and talked all night"
or
"yeah the singer had a crush on me and sent me all kinds of free records"

but you know they are a big liar
and if i knew more about the gay ass shit music they listened to i would call them out on those lies and expose them. this is aimed at someone in particular, but you know what i'm talking about.

i'm working on a magazine, just to get free shit
and working on the official sites for both frankenweenie and t.v.
look for them soon

oh and i need help with my portfolio and resume, so if anyone knows of any stupid design work or illustrator stuff i can do for them then let me know.
Link3 comments|Leave a comment

ideas [May. 5th, 2004|02:36 pm]
richard
[Current Mood |hungryhungry]
[Current Music |bridges and ballons - johanna newsom]

-my head is working overtime, i have big ideas and am gonna do them sometime soon
(please don't take my ideas)

with that said

idea #1
my birthday is coming up in 8 months and it's oh so close
so i have decided that i'm gonna make lots of invitations to a birthday
party and send them out to at least a thousand of the most famous and richest
people in the world oh and political figures and maybe some fictional characters

the reason being:
1. if they don't show up they'll send a card, gift or a letter and i'll still be happy.
2. if they do show up then i'll have lots of famous people at my party.

do you wanna come...

idea #2
today is my first day of a forty day fast
just cayanne pepper, maple syrup, lemons and limes, and water
what a great idea!
Link4 comments|Leave a comment

hot stuff [May. 3rd, 2004|03:18 pm]
richard
today is the hottest day this year where i live

it's 130 degrees outside

hey what was that movie with the people in the station thing and the ants made mounds that reflected the lights and pointed the lights at them so it got really, really hot and then i forgot what happens next.

well it feels like that
Link5 comments|Leave a comment

mistakes [May. 3rd, 2004|12:48 pm]
richard
i'm so happy i have internet access at school
i'll be online most of the day here so if you want IM me at "startexploding"
i'll be using aim express

okay just some quick updates.
i went to a kegger on saturday which was funny because keggers are so high school
but i guess the military peeps caught on to the fun times too
in the words of paul it started out with three bad signs
1. it's in lemoore
2. it's a kegger house party
3. it was put on by the military

so it was okay, but you had to pay at the door to drink which is lame
everyone else got hearts written on with a sharpie
and when they got to me they put some sort of pyramid and i was tripping because i wasn't in the black heart gang.

though i found out later that the pyramid entitled me to VIP access to the backroom
and also VIP status amongst the pitiful heart gang.

arthur threw up alot and i told him "you should stop throwing up"
and i was accused of being insensitive
nicole fell alot and we laughed over that, i didn't fall at all and i was sorta proud of myself because i usually don't have a night where i don't fall

the next day me and jen went and had an irish car bomb at mr. bills
and it was tasty, so so tasty. we went back to her house along with some other peeps
and we drank a little and it was fun

i'm going camping this weekend and want you to come with me
yes you
Link9 comments|Leave a comment

virus [May. 2nd, 2004|10:19 pm]
richard
the computer has a virus and it shuts down after 5 minutes online...i miss all my online friends...
i'll update from school later
Link3 comments|Leave a comment

a message to my fans [Apr. 27th, 2004|12:01 am]
richard
[Current Mood |cheerfulcheerful]
[Current Music |lornadek - aphex twin]

"richard's journal is perhaps the most exciting, coolest journal in the history of journals" - anonymous

i really do care about my fans and i have sorted though the thousands and thousands of letters sent and i thank you for your kind words and suggestions and have an announcement to all you hardcore "richardarians" as you like to call yourself.

announcent: COMING SOON more features, more prizes, up to date news and weather updates, and coming this summer a live video feed of my turtle (lobster) doing various things including and not limited to:

1. eating
2. swimming
3. not moving
4. moving
5. moving a little and then not moving

thank you again for your letters and i assure you every letter is read by myself personally, though with the high volume of letters recieved i cannot respond to you all although i do appreciate it and try to respond as much as i can.
Link2 comments|Leave a comment

viva las vegas [Apr. 26th, 2004|10:40 am]
richard
i went to las vegas this weekend for the first time in my life
and i'm not lame for never going there before I just thought i wouldn't be into it.

i was right, i had the worst time
ok so we get there on friday night and the ride there is great
the city looks amazing with all the pyramids and eiffel towers and big golden lions and lights.
So paul and i walk down the strip and it's really nice though there were a million people and lots of drunk sluts and smut peddlers peddling their smut. we check out all the big casinos on the way and see this awesome show at the bellagio

i wanna gamble so we go into the venitian because it's huge so i sit down and the cocktail waitress comes by and offers me a drink and i sit down at a machine an start stuffing it full of bills and then i reach into my pocket for more cash and some asshole stole it! all my cash and cards and id AND most important of all MY THREE TICKETS TO THE SHARK THING IN MONTERAY. so i file a report and no one really seems like they give a shit and they give me this paper and they i can use it as an id until i get my wallet back.

yeah that paper was awesome it got me kicked out of every casino we were in for the entire weekend and i couldn't order drinks all weekend.

i have a lot more things to write because it got really fun and funny and because paul's a nerd. OH and the funnyest pictures with STAR TREK people...haha

update later
LinkLeave a comment

navigation
[ viewing | 10 entries back ]
[ go | earlier/later ]